The Survivors

"The Survivors" 2014 Gouache on paper 53 x 65 cm

“The Survivors” 2014 Gouache on paper 53 x 65 cm

It would have been good to put together this exhibition, but it is time to move on now. Thinking about a broader canvas, a “Duty of Care” series that could incorporate recent themes as well as those images still to come. Of course I imagine large monolithic works, gallery pieces that will never see the inside of a gallery. However first I must make space in the garage, a depressing exercise that fills me with dread!

"The Voyage" 2014 Gouache on paper. 60 x 84cm.

“The Voyage” 2014 Gouache on paper. 60 x 84cm.

I’ve worked mostly on paper this year. A size that can be worked on my lap in the lounge room. “The Voyage” was finished last night, and is the last of these pictures.

"Family" 2014 Acrylic and spray enamel on paper 45 x 45 cm

“Family” 2014 Acrylic and spray enamel on paper 45 x 45 cm

"A new death" 2014 Acrylic on paper 60 x 50 cm

“A new death” 2014 Acrylic on paper 60 x 50 cm

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Night Wish

"Night Wish" 2014 60 x 50 cm Acrylic and Spray enamel on paper

“Night Wish” 2014 60 x 50 cm Acrylic and Spray enamel on paper

"The Family" 2014 50 x 45 cm Acrylic and Spray enamel on paper

“The Family” 2014 50 x 45 cm Acrylic and Spray enamel on paper

"Adrift" 2014 Acrylic and spray enamel on paper 50 x 60 cm

“Adrift” 2014 Acrylic and spray enamel on paper 50 x 60 cm

The Invisible Artist

New paste-up -  more kangaroos!

New paste-up – more kangaroos!

Every night I crash, despite the desire to continue the street art project. Then, overwhelmed by a sense of uselessness, I abort and seek the comfort of the pillow instead. I’ve been sitting on a number of pieces for a while now, but last night the urgency had returned. The ANU bus stop has bared the remnants of an earlier work since April, and the temptation to add to the spidery grasses has been a nagging constant.

Hard at work, 45 after 12, I was surprised by two students retiring late. They walked straight paste, didn’t even cast a glance, like I was invisible – and maybe I am. The work something to pick at between buses, as invisible as I?

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The night all around seems to reduce most personal fears, and the belief in invisibility has crept in though still the curved concrete does provide a nook to hide a body not really wanting to be seen, and with each passing taxi, I curl into the cream surround – similarly black as the vista beyond the reach of street lights, the air smelling of dew and me accepting of the ritual.

"The Roo" (bus stop paste-up) acrylic on paper April 2014

“The Roo” (bus stop paste-up) acrylic on paper April 2014

Art in a vacuum

New paste-up on in a bus stop on Belconnen Way

New paste-up on in a bus stop on Belconnen Way

I’ve seen this ‘Art’ stencil for about a month in a bus shelter that previously sported my Valentines Tableau paste-up. A question? a statement? or a challenge? I could not decide. My idea was simple, art in a vacuum – seemed an appropriate surround for the lonely words and last night, having fallen asleep on the couch (for a change!), I awoke with my feet tangled in the delicate wire that was my paste-up to be. The time was right and the feeling,nothing a yawn or a cloud could dismiss.

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The air was spring clean weighed down by photinia blossom and expectancy. The young crimson leaves highlighted at the tips, touched by the full moon. An unmarked Police car raced a red light sirens blazing, seemingly reaching 160 km before the road dips at the edge of Scullin. An animal something between an over fed tom cat and a bull mastiff was in hot pursuit. The job was swift, and the transformation of the public amenity pleasing, and I returned home with the thought ‘why the great hiatus?’

"Valentines Tableaux" (bus stop paste-up) Mixed media on paper February 2013

“Valentines Tableaux” (bus stop paste-up) Mixed media on paper February 2013

The Boat

"The Boat" 2014 Acrylic and enamel on board 98 x 138 cm

“The Boat” 2014 Acrylic and enamel on board 98 x 138 cm

The image of the boat has been a recurring theme in my painting for two years. Imagining the claustrophobic hull – the hell of uncertainty. I worked night shift earlier in the year with a young man who made such a journey in 2001. Although only 8 years old at the time, he vividly described three nights jammed in with asylum seekers from a variety of countries, sharing the same goal and the same fear in the wilderness of hours huddled together clutching make shift weapons. They had no idea where they were headed, but for Jamil, fleeing recruitment by the Taliban in Afghanistan, anywhere was a better option than the home he had known. For his parents returning to the motherland remains desirable if not attainable as yet, but not for Jamil, having grown up in Australia, he is now an Aussie, studying medical science at uni, contemplating a gap year, and working shifts to top up the coffers. The idea of returning to Afghanistan now seems foreign, although he wears his ‘boat person’ badge with honor and a wry smile.

"Boat" 201440 x 60 cm enamel on paper

“Boat” 201440 x 60 cm enamel on paper

"Boat" Acrylic on board 60 x 80 cm 2014

“Boat” Acrylic on board 60 x 80 cm 2014

"Voyage" 2013 spray enamel and gouache on paper 100 x 192cm

“Voyage” 2013 spray enamel and gouache on paper 100 x 192cm

"Seeking Asylum"  (bus stop paste-up) Stencil August 2013

“Seeking Asylum” (bus stop paste-up) Stencil August 2013

"Boat" 2013

“Boat” 2013 100 x 192 cm

'Voyage No.2" 2013 spray enamel & gouache on paper 50 x 64 cm

‘Voyage No.2″ 2013 spray enamel & gouache on paper 50 x 64 cm

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Children behind wire

new image from the "behind the Wire" series. 54  64 cm mixed media on paper

new image from the “behind the Wire” series. 54 64 cm mixed media on paper

Variations on a theme

BIRDS SMALL

The transformation comes and goes, sometimes gradually, sometimes at more regular intervals, like the sun falling on wing tips and then it is all consuming. Those beams of light exposing uncertainty, blue fading to leave the shape of a new painting, gleaming, full of promise but not yet real, just an idea. Outlined against the sky, brilliant like metal but in equal part, already a failure. Work consumes me – my day job takes almost as much as I can give. Then with the promise of a shiny playground, I flounder and stall. The new remains unformed, just a list on a page, and my lack of courage or energy to start the new series torments me. I replace uncertainty by diving for pearls, those last illusive images that resonate with an accumulated honesty.

Behind the wire

Behind the wire

 Pictures can become like a dialogue that has been over rehearsed. The transition from subject to subject then becomes a device to avoid endless repetition. Knowing the right time to change direction is an art within the art. Whose eye is upon you? Whose attention do you seek? It’s the same old argument – paint for your self, or paint for others? The madness is still strong 27 years on and the ever watchful bird hovers expecting change, demanding success, something that can be measured. Then everything before is relegated, no longer living for me, yet still raw and painful. Angst is like over salting the cook pot, too much will spoil the sincerity. I guess I’m looking for that one image that sums up the whole body of work. A picture that once achieved makes the necessity to continue the subject redundant. Unless I could sell the stuff in which case I would be motivated by commercial concerns, I suppose.